Honest Smee's Body Shop and Augment Emporium

[Feng]

And now a word from out sponsors....

--The screen depicts a pair of children, a boy and a girl, playing marbles at the park. Judging by their expressions, they appear to be quite bored.--

NARRATOR: HEY KIDS! You ever want to be a superhero? (The kids glance at the screen, ecstatic expressions on their faces)

Kids: YEAH!

--The screen shifts to a wounded looking drifter, huddling tightly to his dust cloak as he traverses a rugged wasteland through a massive sandstorm. The ground rumbles as a colossal mutant beast, some sort of sandworm, erupts from the dunes. With a massive shriek it reveals circling rows of clicking teeth as it lunges towards the wastelander.--

NARRATOR: Adventurers! Looking to gain that extra edge against the massive horrors of the outside world?

--The wastelander, now revealed to be a woman, removes her left arm to reveal.... some sort of arm cannon. With a defiant cry she fires a powerful missile into the creatures gullet. The screen fades to some kid standing outside a massive transmutation circle, gasping in terror at the mangled flesh of a horrifying monstrosity. The audience would note the blonde haired pipsqueak is missing an arm and a leg.--

Narrator: Perhaps you're needing replacement limbs from transgressing into God's domain, botching your most recent attempt to bring your Mom back from the icy grip of death?

--The scene now depicts a rust covered facility, surrounded by all manner of abandoned automata and machinery, evoking the curious vibe of a seedy used car dealership crossed with an eccentric lady's garage sale. A tiny little man (is he even human??) greets the viewers, waving his tiny arms ecstatically in an effort to gain as much attention as his (are they even male?!) tiny form may allow.--

Strange Man: "Greetings tall ones! It is I, Honest Smee, here to offer you the deal of a lifetime! Are you seeking excitement in your misserable, mundane, mortality? Perhaps an extra leg up to reach the tall shelves in life, figuratively and literally? Perhaps you're some sort of transhumanist weirdo who gets a kick out of ascending the copious limitations of human reality and replacing bits and pieces of themselves with machinery?"

(He gives a sagely nod)

Smee: "In that case, I invite you to step on up to Honest Smee's Body Shop and Augment Emporium, you're one-stop destination for your Cybernetic, Esper, and transhumanist needs! Our first class clinical suites are designed to usher you to new unprecedented levels of existence!

"Have you ever wanted to soar through the skies like a jet? Possess a skin of unbreakable adamantium, perhaps? Maybe you wish for the power to shoot fire from your eyes and lightning bolts from, well, you get the idea. Nothing is impossible!

"Financial concerns have you bothered? Never fear! We offer our honorable clientele a wide range of payment options and installment plans, making their dreams of a better tomorrow within an affordable means.

"Don't believe us? Just ask one of our satisfied customers!"

--The screen now shifts to a rather well*ahem*endowed woman who appears to be quite giddy to be on camera~!--

Busty Blonde: "Smee's is tooootally amazing! I used to be some boring nobody named Frank in IT but, like, thanks to his cyber-thingy I am really popular and stuff? ^.~

(With a snap of her fingers she procures a cute flame heart as she leans over to blow a kiss to the camera, as it shifts back over to Smee)

Smee: So step on over to Honest Smee's! Our emporium is located at the corner of Main and Mulberry! Hurry now and take advantage of our President Day's Weekend Saving Bonanza! Twice the augments for half the price! Remember, we CAN rebuild you. We HAVE the technology!

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On the corner of Main Street and Mulberry Avenue, Honest Smee's looms atop the ruins of what was once a Cosmo's Coffee (one of thousands in the city- the loss will be sorely missed by everyone), its open doors open wide in anticipation of opening day traffic! Countless Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tubemen line the walk way in an attempt to invite pedestrians who wander too close for their own good.

Inside is a wide open display area with many life-sized mannequins providing detailed glimpses of the augments and enhancements available through the clinic. One muscle-clad figurine is lifting a hefty paper mache Hummer overhead, another soars above the ceiling with a pair of rocket propelled boots and thrusters built into the hands. Other displays offer abilities such as Psychokinesis, Teleportation, Regeneration-The list goes on!

Other displays promise generous payment plans, although they are rather cryptic about the details....

[Knight Errant]

Dact is wandering the streets when he comes across... wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube mans! He peers inside the odd shop... rubbing his chin. "What on earth is this...?"

[Feng]

"Hello! Hello!" pipes a voice from below Dact's waist.

Were he to look down, he would see a walking colony of rags and sheets, shuffling before him, the only discernible hints that its inhabited being the tiny reflective goggles that eerily gaze up at the traveling knight.... and the tiny hand extended towards him in a gesture of welcoming friendship.

"Welcome to Honest Smee's Body Shop and Augment Emporium! I am Smee. Honest Smee if you please~!" ^^

He gestures at a random mannequin, a dark-haired woman in a powder white dress controlling what is presumably ice and snow. Apparently it is the "Snow Dragon special?". Whatever that means.

"I see you are a man possessing curiosity and a sense of adventure! Would you like a tour, perhaps?"

[Knight Errant]

Dact looks down at the eccentric figure... then around the shop. He nods. "Yes, I think that would be interesting. My name is Dactylos, Mister...?"

[Abillioncats]

Nate walks into the establishment, eyes wide and curious. "So they make super heroes here huh?"

[Feng]

Nate walks into the establishment, eyes wide and curious. "So they make super heroes here huh?"

"Yes, yes!" pipes up a young sales associate, mincing her way over to Nate. "As well as cybernetic-enhanced cops, android assassins, and ninja maids. We like to cater to a spectrum of clientele as wide as the human imagination, valued customer!"

She gives the man a curtsy.

"Welcome to Smee's honorable customer. My name is Midori. How may we be of service to you today?"

Dact looks down at the eccentric figure... then around the shop. He nods. "Yes, I think that would be interesting. My name is Dactylos, Mister...?"

"Smee! Honest Smee if you like," says the tiny person grabbing Dact's hand and shaking it enthusiastically.

He turns to a passing sales girl. "Can I count on the girls to mind the shop, Ashlyn? I will be giving our new friend Dactylos the grand tour of our fine facility."

"You got it," she replies with a giggle before walking over to assist another customer eyeing an over-sized mannequin punching what appears to be a Lawyer-Friendly cameo of Godzilla in the teeth.

"Right! Now that we've got that started, we can begin our exciting tour!"

[AmbushCat]

*A gray-shaded mannequin dressed in black quickly makes a bizarre face at Ashlyn behind her back, then reverts back to normal before it can be noticed.*

[Abillioncats]

"Well I uh, would like to see what you have before I decide to get anything."

[Knight Errant]

Dact shakes his hand, nodding. He glances around at some of the store associates. "Huh... alright, lets go." Interesting help he's hired.

[Feng]

"Well I uh, would like to see what you have before I decide to get anything."

"Oh, but of course, honorable customer!" says Midori, with another bow. "Do feel free to browse through our expansive show room. Our mannequins depict are more popular augments, of course" she says, gesturing to a mannequin of a short woman waving a hand cannon, suspended above the floor via a back mounted jet pack.

"Of course if you have a concept in mind, our highly trained staff can quickly set you up with what you need as well."

She reaches into a pocket on her apron and procures a business card, handing it to Nate.

"Of course if you need help with anything, and I do mean anything, then please feel free to ask for me at the help desk, cutey." ^.~

*A gray-shaded mannequin dressed in black quickly makes a bizarre face at Ashlyn behind her back, then reverts back to normal before it can be noticed.*

Ashlyn sneezes, oblivious to the mannequin's shenanigans, as she goes straight to demonstrating the capabilities of the Snow Dragon model to an interested consumer!

Dact shakes his hand, nodding. He glances around at some of the store associates. "Huh... alright, lets go." Interesting help he's hired.

Dact might notice two distinct things about the store associates through his observations.

The first and most obvious detail is that the majority of the store staff are eerily similar in appearance to one another. While there might be some slight aesthetic differences in wardrobe (a butterfly pin here, an ID badge with happy face stickers there), for the most part the store has an eerie Nurse Joy situation going for it.

Secondly, all the girls are using augments of their own in the show room. It might be hard to recognize, as they are rather subtle in their use but.... There, that girl is carrying a stack of boxes containing hardware that should be a tad too heavy for her to move with such ease. And there! Another sales associate is gently floating off the ground in order to reach a display piece that would normally be just out of her reach.

"Ah yes, the girls are amazing, aren't there?" says Smee, noticing Dact's wandering eye. "Their involvement is crucial to this business' success!"

[Knight Errant]

Dact nods. "I see... you give them these upgrades, I take it?" He says, looking back to the shopkeeper. "What is it they do, exactly?"

[Feng]

Dact nods. "I see... you give them these upgrades, I take it?" He says, looking back to the shopkeeper. "What is it they do, exactly?"

"Good eye, tall one!" giggles Smee. "Yes, all my employees have been given appropriate augments to help make their workload much more manageable. Given the nature of the job, it can be quite rough on the individual. Of course I won't go into details about which augments, exactly. Trade secret, you understand."

He motions at the bustling show room.

"Their main job, though, is to help run the day-to-day functions of the business. This room here is our show room where we try to demonstrate the latest augments and enhancements that have been released to the public. As you can see my ladies have done a lovely job creating informative displays detailing what each new augment does, be it flight, enhanced strength, or superior Kung-Fu grip."

He motions to a mannequin of a busty catgirl, waving her left arm in a manner similar to a kitty.

"Naturally imagination is prized at the Body Shop. It is my hope that I am fostering the girl's creativity by assigning them the task of designing the new displays each week."

[Abillioncats]

"Thanks..." Nate looked at the business card, before looking back at Midori. "Well I do have one thing in mind...I uh, I'm a pretty big fan of cats."

[Feng]

"Thanks..." Nate looked at the business card, before looking back at Midori. "Well I do have one thing in mind...I uh, I'm a pretty big fan of cats."

"Oh! Say no more honorable customer! I think we have just the thing!" she says, gently taking Nate by the hand. "Right this way please," she says, nudging him past a crowd of men gawking at a rather busty mannequin in a scandalously skimpy bikini.

"Ah, here we are!" she says, pointing to a line of head mannequins, each with their own set of cat ears attached. But wait, are those ears twitching??

"These are one of our newest popular items, Prosthetic kitty ears designed to grant our customers the hearing capacity of a house cat! Of course that is not all that it is capable of. Special sensors placed in the tips of the ears help improve balance."

[Abillioncats]

"Oh wow." Nate looked the cat ears over, clearly interested in them as he watched them twitch on the mannequin. "How much do these cost? Am I allowed to try it on first?"