Magical Sailor Fuku

Okay, so who's seen the G.I. Joe movie? Raise of hands? Okay, who actually watched the old TV show and played with the toys when they were kids? I mean the 6" action figures, not the "Barbies with Guns" kind. (Yes, I am aware that the original G.I. Joe was a Barbie sized doll, but he wasn't as much an action figure as he was a boy's Raggedy Ann.) Okay, that's fewer hands. How about this one: Who actually read the comics? Hardly any, eh?

This is how I feel when I talk about G.I. Joe with my friends. Half of them never even heard about it until those crappy Youtube PSA spinoffs. If ever I mention something about a "Weather Dominator" they think I'm some mad scientist or something. But now...there's this movie. And I have to say, it's freakin'... average.

When will directors learn that a shaky camera does not equal more action? Yes, when it was first done in certain war movies, it added greatly to the experience. But without a clear shot of the action, it's hard to tell what's going on. In a war movie, you don't have to know what's going on. It's war, it's supposed to be a mindless clusterf---. But in a movie that feels more like an extended saturday morning cartoon? Really. Aside from the jumpy action, I was happy with how the characters came out, for the most part. It didn't get too involved, while at the same time it gave us enough to know who was who and who did what. Again, just enough to have fun and enjoy the ride. And I'll admit, it was pretty fun.

The things I most definitely did not like were the flashbacks. Yes, there was some backstory that needed to be exposed, but it was done in such a disjointed manner. What ticked me off the most was Stormshadow and Snake Eyes, the two ninjas. Rather than show two kids punching each other over some wonton, it would have been much clearer if Stormshadow had just taunted Snake Eyes while they were fighting. Not only would it have established their rivalry, but the arrogance in his voice would have made Stormshadow appear that much more like the slimy cockroach he is. (Also, what's with the molded lips in Snake Eyes' suit? Am I the only person that was disturbed by that?) At least he kicked butt and never said a word. Classic Snake Eyes.
**Spoiler!**
Also, why in all that is holy did they kill off Stormshadow? I mean, these two guys have the biggest, nastiest rivalry in the entire Joe universe! How can you not keep it going?!
**End Spoiler!**

In conclusion, I liked it. Not much better than Transformers, but hey, they're both based off of toy lines for crying out loud. Oh, and what is up with Cobra Commander? Is a slick metal veneer not sinister enough? I mean, you can almost see through that mask in the movie. It's ridiculous. He's supposed to represent the "faceless terror" of worldwide threats of peace. I just... don't see that.

Anyways, my ranting is done. What did you think of the movie? Good, bad, almost as sucky as DragonBall? Tell us!

better then transformers 2 i agree with... but honestly that's not saying much.

if anything save you money and rent it, some parts were mildly entertaining... others made me cring or laugh at how crappy they were.

Yeah, it's a good movie. I see they have the video game for PSP, Xbox 360, Nitendo Wii, and PS3. I have Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen for PSP, and I know they have that for PC, and all major video game systems (wii, ps3, xbox 360).

I saw the DragonBall Evolution Z edition for PSP.

They had Dr Mindbender in that GI Joe movie, and they showed Destro's new metal face look, and Zartan became a real "Master of Disguise," now posing as the US President. I wonder how that is going to work out in the sequel, as Duke and the Joes had captured Cobra Commander and Destro, and the Baroness/Anna DeCobranay.

The Neo Vipers (the Cobra Storm Troopers) were all mind controlled, as were Baroness and Destro, and Zartan with the Nanotech Dr Mindbender shared with Rex Lewis/Cobra Commander.

Marlon Wayans was Ripcord was so funny, and Randy Quaid played Gen. Hawk. For someone who survived being attacked by Zartan, he was quite resourceful and tough.


Robot Chicken had the Villains Carpool sketch (80's TV cartoon villains carpooling to work), Behind the Terrordrome (explores behind the scenes with COBRA Commander, Destro, Baroness, and the other members of Cobra, and the Battle of the Weather Dominator.

I honestly thought I was the only sane man inside the theater when they were showing this. The movie was filled with horrible jokes that everybody was howling to. The only thing I can say about GI Joe that was good was the middle action scene when everyone was trying to stop the Cobra members from destroying the Eiffel Tower. Everything else was just garbage, pure predictable garbage.

I saw some funny Youtube Gi Joe wondercon cosplay, which had Cobra Commander, the Crimson Guard (twins Xamot and Tomax), Baroness, and Destro and GI Joe Ninja Snake Eyes. There was no storm shadow, duke, or scarlett.


I did see an old GI Joe live action movie (looks 80'sish), where Cobra Commander wants the Apophus Stone (Apophus is the Egyptian god of the dead), and Duke, Lady Jaye, and Snake Eyes went after it, and were confronted by Major Bluud, Baroness, and some Viper troopers, and Zartan was in it too.

They made a parody of the gi joe psa's on Youtube...with "Body Massage" and "Porkchop Sandwiches"....and some funny g1 transformers commercials featuring Optimus Prime advertising "Energon O's".